👋 Intro

When I was trying to change people—or ‘over-control’ a situation—one of my mentors, Joseph Romeo (God rest his soul), used to look me in the eye and say:

“Matt, when are you going to resign your position as general manager of the universe?”

Short answer? Not 20 years ago when he first tried to get me to see this. But maybe… just maybe… a little more now. (Thanks, Nadine (my wife), my other mentors, and Mel Robbins and her Let Them Theory, for the extra pushes.)

A lot of what you’re about to read dovetails off last week’s edition.

If you’re looking to be more effective—if you want people to actually see things your way—here’s a hard truth: stop gripping so tight.

1 – 🚗 Merging Into a Change

I do this old-school yoga exercise video (early 2000s) from trainer Chris Freytag. (For the record, she still makes new content and has a great site Get Healthy U TV). She has a line I love:

“Go for progress over perfection.”

I think of conversions—especially faith journeys—like a merge ramp. Most of us want people to skip the ramp and immediately hit the highway at 70 mph—our highway, our speed, our way.

But people don’t work that way.

⚠️ Warning: Controversial religious opinion ahead!

Take a TV preacher like Joel Osteen. I’ve heard all the criticisms—prosperity preacher, heretic, whatever. Maybe he is.

But picture this: A man sits alone and desperate on his couch, no faith, no hope, a gun in his mouth. Joel Osteen’s voice comes through the TV, and that man hears a Godly message that gives him a sliver of hope… enough to change his mind about ending it all—at least for this moment.

Is Joel Osteen bad for that? Or did he just get progress over perfection?

That man wasn’t ready for a Baptist or Catholic church pew. God met him where he was—through Joel. Maybe that was his on-ramp to the “Highway to Heaven.” (Yes, I’m old enough for that TV show reference—are you?)

Next time you’re tempted to judge someone’s “imperfect” start, remember: merging takes time. Be grateful they’re even on the ramp.

2 – ✅ Only Watch This If You Trust Me

When I think about making content for Auxiom , The BLTnT Podcast , or even a random social post, I ask myself:

Have I built the social credit to be trusted?

While arguing that his faith journey was better than someone else’s, a friend referenced Luke 12:51 (“Jesus came to divide”) as a part of his argument.  His friend stood up, left, and—well—it didn’t work.

To the credit, of a strong relationship, the two later spoke and apologized and took another chance to talk. It appears that the friendship was strong enough to survive that one curt moment.

Here’s the lesson:

“Seek first to understand before you think you’ve earned the right to convert.”

And let’s be honest—Jesus didn’t share that hard teaching from a mountaintop to the masses; He shared it privately with trusted disciples.

So, whether it’s faith, social media, or business: If you haven’t invested in the relationship, don’t expect people to take the detour you’re recommending.

Oh—and this is definitely something I’m working on…so, if you catch me screwing this up, you have my permission to call me out.

3 – 🎶 You’re So Lame (Vain)… You Probably Think This Bite Is About You

I have a vacation home in an HOA condo community. And oh boy, it’s the land of good and plenty—good fortune (beautiful place, great amenities, etc.)… and PLENTY of opinions.

Have you watched The Gilded Age on HBO Max? George Russell is my hero—calm while everyone else emotionally implodes. He just shrugs at New York’s elite and keeps moving.

(OK SPOILER ALERT — I’m now into the most recent episodes and he turns into a bit of a jerk…might not be my hero anymore)

Meanwhile, we’ve all met people with what my wife calls “Lunch Lady Syndrome”—people who get a tiny bit of power and wield it like Thor’s hammer:

1. The mean lunch lady at school.
2. The condo stranger who corrects your kids unsolicitedly.
3. The Lane Cop—you know, the one who blocks the merge lane in a construction zone because they’ve decided you shouldn’t zipper merge (even though DOT literally tells us to).

Here’s my take: I support the merging car more than the lane cop. And I’ll always support the kid building a tree fort over the old butt head trying to shut it down 😉!!!

So yeah, (I’m singing it – not as good as Carly Simon) you’re so (vain) lame… you probably think this Bite is about you.

4 – 🐦 Family Feud in the Bird’s Nest

Family relationships can feel like birds in a nest—squawking, pecking, fighting over food (attention, money, being right).

When parents are young and healthy, they’re like the mama bird keeping everyone in order. But as they age—and kids become adults with their own families—it gets murkier. Throw in a divorce or two? Even murkier.

Want adult siblings rowing together? Think of family like you think of business leadership:

• It doesn’t have to be your idea—make it theirs.
• Take others’ opinions into account like you would at work.
• And stop complaining to people who can’t make the decision.

For that last one…remember this…At work, you don’t “sell” to the janitor—you sell to the CEO, the CFO, the purchasing person. Same goes for family.  Don’t keep commiserating with your non-decision-making siblings!

And please—if you’ve never watched Bob Newhart’s classic “STOP IT!” sketch… stop reading right now and go watch it. BEST ADVICE EVER – I PROMISE!

5 – 🎯 What Team Is Working on You?

My friend James Hall recently told me about a book called Beyond High Performance by Jason Jaggard. It hits hard.

Jaggard says:

“One of the most important teams you’ll ever build isn’t the team you lead—it’s the team that works on you.”

He describes four teams every high performer needs:

1. The Team You Work For – The skill is following; the danger is becoming a sheep.
2. The Team You Work With – The skill is collaboration; the danger is groupthink.
3. The Team That Works For You – The skill is leading; the danger is turning into a tyrant.
4. The Team That Works On You – The game-changer. Coaches, mentors, truth-tellers. The danger? Being a tourist—listening but never changing.

Jeff Bezos, Steve Jobs, and Michael Jordan all acknowledged needing teams that worked on them.

Jaggard nails it: “In the video game of life, everyone has a next level, and no one gets there alone.”

So—who’s on your Obi-Wan / Yoda / Call your ass out team? Who have you given permission to call you out? And when they do… do you actually change, or just nod politely like a tourist passing through?

🔁 That’s a Wrap

Joe Romeo was right—resign your position as general manager of the universe. Step back. Merge people gently. Build trust before you preach. Support the merger, not the lane cop. Sell the family on the mission, don’t demand it. And let the right team work on you.

Oh—and SERIOUSLY stop taking yourself so seriously. Otherwise, I’m gonna sing… 🎶 “You’re so lame…”

And if you’re likin’ what you’re readin’ or hearin’ in the 5 Bites, there’s more where that came from:

👉 www.BLTnT.com

Until next time…Excelsior!

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This edition was proudly sponsored by Auxiom.

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About 5 Bites

5 Bites is a weekly serving of bite-sized insights across Business, Life, Technology, and Transformations—built for leaders, learners, and curious minds who want faster takeaways that stick and ignite something explosive 🧨